Gravity

"It is really a natural trend or lapse into taking one's self gravely, because it is the easiest thing to do. ... For solemnity flows out of men naturally; but laughter is a leap. It is easy to be heavy: hard to be light." -- G.K. Chesterton

Sometimes it feels as though the thin walls that protect me will crumble, and my world will fall apart beneath my feet. No disaster has struck; in fact, things are going semi-well. But that disturbs me more than disaster. I can already see the period of rest coming to a close when I talk to some of my co-workers. A girl I went to high school with is also working here, and we've been getting to know one another. I've really enjoyed it; it turns out we have a lot in common. I never had a chance to find that out in high school, where we ran in different social circles, intersecting only in choir and band. I still had a high opinion of her, though, because she seemed like one of the few authentic Christians there. I still think she was (and is). But now she's been through her first year of college and a rough breakup, and she's a shadow of the girl she once was. She's still solid, but barely. I hate seeing this, and I don't know quite what to do about it. We've been sharing verses and encouragement, but I'm still unsure of myself. I have never been good at explaining myself when I talk, and I worry that I'll lead her astray or something. There's also the fact that some of the things she's struggling with are things that I am still in the midst of overcoming or learning to live with. In other words, I don't know how to deal with them, either. I want to help, but I really feel like I can't. That feeling's very frustrating.

I want to do something to help diminish the stigma that still surrounds depression and other mental disorders. I hate that we can't talk about it, even though almost all of the girls I have gotten even semi-close with have all had experience with depression. I hate that I couldn't tell most people that my sister was recently diagnosed with bipolar disorder without fearing their reaction. I hate that only four years ago, someone told me she didn't believe depression was real. Surely something can be done. Surely something can change public attitude. The question remains: Who and what will it take before people finally wake up?